Sometimes the Smallest Things Take Up the Most Room in Your Heart
If I could compare the anticipation of big little reveal night to anything else, I would say it’s kind of like the anticipation of waiting for…. a blind date to arrive? (At least I think?! Pretty much what I’m going to conclude from my extensive experience…. of watching romcoms). Before we met, I was able to gather some more intel about my future little (I promise it gets less creepy). We’re the same major, both pre-med, we absolutely adore Disney songs, our favorite colors are baby blue, we’re involved in similar organizations, and of course, what bonds us the most-- we have a mutual love for boba. I knew she was the one. She was absolutely perfect. I was SO excited throughout the night leading up to the reveal, happily preparing our matching costumes while cutting out our faces for the poster I was making. But when the time came, as I hid behind a bush in front of Bovard, attempting to hide my large, rainbow umbrella hat, my excitement turned into utter nervousness. Is she going to like me?! Am I going to live up to her expectations as a big? What if she’s disappointed when she finds out it's me?!
Thankfully, when Nikki found me, all the feelings of pure excitement came back, and I remember feeling like she would soon become the little sister I had always wanted. We clicked instantly, and my favorite memory from big little reveal night was showing Nikki our “famILY” line, and then surprising her with a donation from the entire family to her service trip abroad! My hope was that Nikki would experience the love and joy that I felt as a rosebud getting taken in by my bigs, and that she would feel welcomed into not only the Helenes family, but our own little family as well.
Throughout that semester, Nikki quickly became one of my best friends-- we felt comfortable sharing practically anything with each other, and we constantly encouraged each other in our faith. She came to me for advice about school and Helenes, yet through it all I looked up to her so much. Half the time I was the one getting advice from this freshman who was wise beyond her years! One special moment I distinctly remember was during big little appreciation week. When I opened Nikki’s gift, expecting it to be a small snack as any other kind little would’ve done, I was in shock when I found a new Bible with my name engraved on it. That present was so incredibly thoughtful and meaningful to me, and is just a clear testament to the kind of person Nikki is. Her diligence in all that she does, and her passion for Helenes and her rosebud sisters revived my love for Helenes, and reminded me of the privilege we have to be a part of such an incredible organization.
I didn’t understand how an immediate friendship could just suddenly appear from a big little relationship, until I was lucky enough to truly experience it myself. As a big, I really don’t know if I’ve lived up to the expectations that were set before me. What I do know is that Helenes is filled with incredibly gracious, understanding, inspiring individuals who will absolutely love and accept you for you. So at the end of the day, all the questions racing through my head, all the anxiety I felt about this “blind date” didn’t even matter. Helenes bigs and littles are so precious because above all, we are all bound by our deep care and love for one another as sisters in the organization. I’m lucky to say that finding my little introduced me to someone I didn’t even know I needed-- and I’m sure the same can be said for so many others!